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Senior Correspondent

The answer is to buy a sailboat and do your own work!

1. Walk the dock six times pushing a cart loaded with supplies. Build strength and endurance. Good work for arms and core muscles.

2. Lift all supplies from the dock onto the boat, down the companionway hatch and into the boat.

3. Walk at least three more times to the toilets and showers. More as needed when you drink lots of water to stay hydrated.

4. Climb in and out of the lazarette to make one simple adjustment on the battery charger. (For you non-sailors, a lazarette is a storage compartment in the cockpit of a sailboat, not designed for human storage. Anyone with shoulders larger that Ed, by even an inch definitely won’t fit. Ed had to scrape off some skin to wedge himself in and back out.) Note: Keep lots of band aids on board.

4. Wire your own stereo system. This means clearing out the storage bins under the settees on both starboard and port sides, then winding your body into positions more complicated than advanced yoga while managing a drill, screwdriver or any other tools that can fit in two hands.

5. Varnish small pieces of wood on the dock with the wind blowing 20 knots. Hold down the newspaper with one leg and foot, hold varnish in one hand, brush in the other and use the free foot to hold the wood piece in place. Maintain position until wood is dry enough to move. Sand. Do varnish maneuver all over again.

6. Store non-perishable food and paper supplies in compartment under starboard settee which means removing cushions (again) and piling them on the forward bunk (which must be cleaned off at night for sleeping.)

7. If this doesn’t give you enough stretching and bending, there is always cleaning up the sawdust and fiberglass generated by drilling the holes for wiring and speakers, which means crawling around on the floor with a dust broom and dust pan in hand, dishes to wash and put away, decks to wash and the many chores of living on board.

8. Clean off the dinette table for a meal, or better yet, eat out!

And we call this fun!

But it does come with breakfast in the cockpit watching the sun come up.

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