Quiet leaders struggle with talkers. They wonder if we’ll ever shut up.
Leaders should be wondering if they talk too little not too much.
10 dangers of talkative leaders:
- Forgetfulness. By the time you stop talking, they forgot what they were going to say.
- Dis-empowerment. You make others feel unimportant.
- Confirmation. The more you talk, the more you convince themselves yourself you’re right.
- Disengagement. After a while, everyone just gives up.
- Fear. They’re afraid to make a short comment because you’ll drone on and on in response.
- Confusion. You bring up several points before asking for feedback. The silence you hear is caused by the confusion you create.
- Pressuring. Talking feels like pressure to quiet people.
- Arrogance. The longer you talk the more self-important you feel.
- Rudeness. You interrupt.
- Rabbit chasing. You take conversations/meetings in distracting directions.
5 ways quiet leaders deal with talkers in meetings:
- Interrupt them politely. Good manners become poor leadership when talkers dominate meetings.
- Address questions others before the talker begins talking. “Mary, what’s your take on this idea?”
- Stand with your back to them.
- Give everyone in the room one minute to offer their best contribution to the conversation.
- Have a tough conversation with them before the meeting.
7 Ways quiet leaders get the most from talkative team mates:
- Respect their thought processes. Talkers think and talk at the same time.
- Ask for conclusions when they start giving explanations.
- Say, “What do you want?”
- Ask, “What’s the next step?”
- Establish a natural ending by asking them to walk to your next meeting with you.
- If they ask, “Got a minute?” Tell them exactly how long you have and stick to it.
- When you cut them off, stay open to their input. Say, “I’ll be glad to continue this conversation next Tuesday.”
How might quiet leaders deal with talkative teammates?