icon-email icon-facebook icon-linkedin icon-print icon-rss icon-search icon-stumbleupon icon-twitter icon-arrow-right icon-email icon-facebook icon-linkedin icon-print icon-rss icon-search icon-stumbleupon icon-twitter icon-arrow-right icon-user Skip to content
Senior Correspondent

Let all things be exactly as they are. –A Course in Miracles

There is currently a big brouhaha in American football over the referees. Referees in any sport are subject to criticism and must have thick skins to do their jobs. But the referees who are now officiating NFL games are replacements for the regular refs, who are locked out during a labor dispute. The new refs have walked into a firestorm.

The replacement refs are drawn from the ranks of retired officials, college refs, and refs from other leagues. They have come under heavy criticism, to put it mildly, in the first weeks of the season as they scramble to get up to speed, learning new rules and applying them in the midst of fast paced games in front of tens of thousands of spectators and millions more watching on TV.

The furor peaked over a call in the last seconds of Monday Night Football. With the game hanging on the last play, the quarterback threw the ball into the end zone as players from both teams reached for it and fell to the ground in a heap of arms and legs furiously fighting for the ball. Two officials ran up to the scrum. One official signaled a winning touchdown; the other signaled a losing interception.

Not a good situation to be in. A decision had to be made, and the touchdown was announced. The Internet and TV commentators have been in an uproar ever since.

Although I have an opinion, I’m not here to debate the correctness of that decision, or any other decision the refs have made this season. Like other fans, I have felt frustration and dismay over calls made and not made. But more than anything, I have felt tremendous compassion for these people, thrown into a situation they did not seek out, unprepared for the responsibility thrust upon them, struggling to do their best in front of millions, vilified by millions more.

Have you ever had a nightmare about being called upon to do something you are not prepared to do? I’ve dreamt that I have to take an exam for a class I didn’t know I was signed up for. Oh, yeah, and those dreams where we show up in public naked or otherwise dressed inappropriately. These refs are living that nightmare.

I don’t even have to look to my dreams. I have been in real life situations where I was in over my head. I’m thinking back now to when I was a young lawyer tagging along with more experienced lawyers to handle a negotiation for a multi-million dollar transaction. My job was pretty much to watch and learn. However, at one point in a meeting, I misunderstood something that was said to me and proceeded to do something so embarrassing (in a professional sense–I still had all my clothes on!) that I still cringe to think of it. To the other lawyers’ credit, they did not subject me to the sort of reprobation heaped upon these replacement refs. In fact, they quickly corrected my mistake and moved on with no further comment.

It happens. Tony Dungy, a former Super Bowl winning coach and now a commentator, observed that, while it is true that the replacement refs are making mistakes, nevertheless coaches and players must go ahead and play the game. You play the hand you’re dealt. You don’t blame the refs. Or the weather. Or the injuries. Or the alignment of the planets. You do your best with what you’ve got.

There are a lot of folks screaming for the return of the regular refs. There are probably a few replacement refs wishing for the same thing. At the least, I’m guessing those replacement refs wish they had had more time to get prepared. They probably wish they had had more NFL experience before having the whole country scrutinizing their every move.

Sometimes, we expend a lot of energy wanting things to be other than what they are. I’m still looking for more than 24 hours in a day, for example. And I’m really, really wishing I had the old Blogger interface back. But there is wisdom in Tony Dungy’s words. We can rant all we want, but in the end we are left to play the hand we’re dealt.

Have you ever found yourself in over your head, needing to perform with inadequate preparation or experience? (If you are a parent, the answer is definitely yes!) What helped you get through it? Or perhaps you were on the other side, with more experience but having to deal with folks who were not up to speed. How did you handle that?

I hope you will share your own experiences.
 

Stay Up to Date

Sign up for articles by Galen Pearl and other Senior Correspondents.

Latest Stories

Choosing Senior Living
Love Old Journalists

Our Mission

To amplify the voices of older adults for the good of society

Learn More